Final Writing Assignment chp.16

I wouldn't've read chp.16 unless I was assigned to.
but that was a great chapter to think of my life.

I found lots of questions in this chapter, most of which I cannot answer.

work
relationship
renewal
physical health
purpose
             for personal vitality and thriving

out of these five, I think I have to think of "renewal" and "purpose" more.
(I need a bit more exercise though)

"Are there times when you can forget the needs of others and lose yourself in nonwork activities that are absorbing and renewing?"

No.
I feel like I'm always chased by something. I have to do this and that and... always like this.
one of my bad habits is that when I'm done a work in an early time, I think of the next one that can be put off for that time, always thinking "I have to do this by that time..." though I often eventually don't finish it until I need to hurry to finish.
I have to allow myself to liberate from pressure for some time.
I think I'm really pressured until 6/22, when my final exam for this term ends, but I will try to have time of renewal.

I keep sleeping early even if I have lots of work to do though :)
This made me able to do work a lot more efficiently than last year.
I'm gonna have hard time next week (since I have about 1.5 time more units than this term), but I will try finding time for liberty.



"What are the deeper values that guide your work?"
People, especially who are important to me.
I often value my work by determining if it gives a positive influence to others.
If I can imagine someone who gets happier for my work, then I can work hard.

This value really works, at least much better than working for happiness of myself.
I don't basically like to study, but I try to motivate myself to think that this will help my education to children.

But as I've written several times, I still wonder if this is the best.
Because I know this is "good" in many ways, that means I am "good" and doing things that are "good." I'm not quite sure of the difference between working for others and self-satisfaction now.

And I know the answer for this.
Christian view does not make such a confusion I have now.
Because with that view, I'm not good but God lets me to do good.

Though I am a Christian, I don't have such a view and motivation.
and also I believe that just knowing that doesn't mean anything.
To be able to think that way, I need to be spiritually faithful.
there involves lots of religious things and contradiction(?), so it's difficult to think of it, especially in English ><

But for now, just let me say I like people :)
I feel like I have a duty to influence others somehow positively since my existence itself involves lots of damage and energy consuming to the world.